Episode #020 — Kirby Meikle’s Vision: Thriving as a Neurodivergent Entrepreneur

Melanie Branch: Hello and welcome to Trailblazers Rising where we are sharing strategies and stories for scaling beyond limits today I am so excited to bring to you my friend Kirsten like Kirby she and I have worked together and known each other for years now and she is not only a fantastic woman human entrepreneur energy worker she is somebody that I hold very near and dear as a good trusted friend and confidant.

So welcome Kirsten I'm going to refer to you to both as both Kirby and Kristen throughout this because that's what I call you so we're talking about the same person everybody so welcome

Kirby: thank you thank you thank you it's a pleasure to be here with you

Melanie Branch: so we'll dive right in

all right so what's first your entrepreneurial fire and if you realize I have to start my own business I can't keep doing what somebody else tells me to do.

So I feel

Kirby: like I was born with this fire I've been I've been a hustler my whole life ever since I was like a wee child like I started working when I was 12 so working for someone else it's not easy right and I I require something that's I have more control in so like that entrepreneurial ship.

Journey has been lifelong but really it was I can't have the life I want chained to a desk

Melanie Branch: yeah yeah absolutely

Kirby: that was the biggest struggle with like call center jobs like everything that I went through like I enjoy the connection with people and having like that time to really connect with someone.

Like I I I feel like every step of my journey led me and developed me with skills and abilities to really be able to connect authentically with people in multiple environments like I've always been in that environment that you know you have to be a people person right? Because that's what I do so it being part of me and like making that into my own business where I can.

You take all that is me important to it it's just it was a natural step

Melanie Branch: I love that absolutely could not agree more so you're a quantum coach and I know what that means I work on the quantum field as well in terms of energy and energy healing and energy work but give us a little if somebody had no idea who you are and what it is you do tell them who you are and what you do.

Kirby: So I really focus on like the human and making sure you're in the best alignment of you and yourself cause like we have layers we have our mental body our physical body our emotional body and our energetic body the quantum is what ties all that together so people talk about like work fields like your presence when you walk into a room like your energy levels like all of that is quantum.

Everything is energy right we've we've established that fact several times like when we've worked together like everything is energy so if we want to make an impact on a physical mental or emotional level you have to make that impact on an energetic level so that is the quantum realms that realms that go beyond.

This dimension this reality that we're in and you could like go scientific on it You could go like spiritual with it the bottom line is like there's something that we tap into and Quantum physics is really bringing that to light and like giving us more insight into how it works And I love that it's supporting stuff that was already known in ancient times.

But what I do is I incorporate knowledge and like See what is going to resonate with the human that I'm working with so that's where I'm coaching at a quantum level to really transform you at those other levels and those other layers to your human

Melanie Branch: yeah yeah so how would you say then since we're talking to other entrepreneurs at different levels and whatnot how would you.

Recommend people find balance in the like at the quantum level like what is how do I know that I need quantum work

Kirby: when you've been working with every other aspect? And there's still something missing it's like this like itch of like I need more like you've gone to therapy you've gone to the doctor they're telling you everything's normal within normal range.

You've you know done a lot of the personal work you've done the personal trainer route you're looking at nutrition like there's something that's not connecting right? And it's really like that connection piece and that flow piece that I focus on because you're doing all of this work but is it being integrated?

Is it penetrating at the level you need it to? You know so many people are focused on like I need to be healthy and they have this narrow mindset of what healthy is healthy is balance healthy is sustainability healthy is something where you work with the tools that you have you know it's something that I really appreciate.

Like you've talked about this article where they did that research between your two milkshakes and like which one's works for you so like I know you tell that way better than I do but like that's it's it's mindset it's also your perspective of like is this actually benefiting me? Because every human is different.

Every human is unique are we really embracing that individuality? I'm really asking your system what it needs because so many people are trying to find answers outside themselves and figure out like Oh I need to follow this latest trend does that trend resonate with your system? Does your system need to go keto or does it need to go vegan?

Let's ask the system if you have more of that it will be identified as like a energy yeah you know it's it's something that we can kind of group together and like categorize and it's something that was categorized previously but we like Oh that doesn't exist right but like what if it's just a way to express something that's uniquely innate about certain groups of beings right?

If you have more of a a certain background or more you know you resonate with different things right it's like I have to be careful what metals I wear because my my system is very reactive and so like certain times in my life like I'll get reactive to things and I'm like I've noticed that's when I'm in more of my fey like energy.

Yeah but fey is something that was described previously and like what if it was a description of something about us? You know

Melanie Branch: I think it's so important for people to understand to that degree that everyone's different everybody came here for a different purpose and a different reason and everybody's systems and body reacts differently to certain things.

Right? So you know at a real basic level of understanding it are you working out? You know are you moving your body? I'm not telling you they got to go spend hours at the gym every single day but you have to move your body are you eating foods that make you feel good? Because I'll tell you what instant release dopamine foods are just as high up there on the list of importance as extended release dopamine foods right?

We know a high protein diet is going to benefit an 80 each year and we also know that two Oreos is going to give me the get up and go that I need to knock out the last five emails before I can check out for the night and stop working you know? So it's really that connecting holistically to your mind body and spirit and putting the control back in your own hands.

Kirby: Yeah that's your life it's your human like what is the best optimized you know systems and routines and schedule? Like there's all these different names you put to it but like what systems work for you? Whether that's like your time management systems whether that's like your energy management systems whether that's like your accommodations for yourself like the goal is for you to be good like balanced.

In homeostasis and that ability to function and ebb and flow because you know we're there's so many factors into what's going to impact your energy whether you're a menstruating being whether you are more synced up with the moon the sun whether you have you know some fluctuations because your emotional body is overwhelmed and your physical body is when we come at it at this holistic like what part of me needs support right now.

We can really like hone in like I I am mentally hyper but physically exhausted how can I accommodate that? How can I find that balance of like achieving what I want to achieve and moving you know my life in a forward direction momentum like I love this cause I I connected with with Tara you guys may hear about her.

She's amazing and she's part of the community she talked about yeah she's she's phenomenal I'm excited for her to connect with you more on this she has this go visual where you start where you are right? And then the go isn't always going straight forward the word go circles back and builds and then launches right?

A lot of times we're thinking go is always forward movement go is recognizing where you are and revving your engine and pressing the gas that is what go means so if you need to get go go juice you have to take a moment and be like do I have gas in my tank? If not I need to fill my tank before I can press on the gas.

So that's where you're accommodating like what what deficiencies do I have? What's kind of holding me back stopping me from showing up in the way I want to in this moment?

Melanie Branch: Yeah well and that's a very important point to make because it now is about accommodations right? So whether you're self diagnosed.

Or formally diagnosed ADHD autistic both because we know they have a very high comorbidity percentage and likelihood at least for me and the community that I really speak to we were told that we have anxiety or depression or I mean even more so sometimes you get told bipolar and all this other sort of stuff and then what happens is we start we've been we've been conditioned our entire life to believe that whatever is happening with us and causing us issue and challenges in our life is going to be fixed.

And then we will just go back to being quote unquote normal and everything will be fine you'll be able to abide by all these rules and work these regular boring jobs and do all of this and they'll be easy peasy lemon squeezy and then you find out oh wait a minute my neurotype is different I am a neurodivergent human being.

Whatever you identify as right? Because neurodivergent neurospicy is the entire umbrella of neurodivergence right? We don't discriminate here and I don't need to know all your diagnoses you self identify as neurodivergent come hang out we can have a good time so now it's about I don't need to be sick.

I need accommodation so that I can embrace what makes me incredible and superhuman and powerful and do more of that and worry less about mapping my socks up and you know keeping my house clean and all these other like I personally hate brushing my teeth the executive function that goes into all right I'm not getting my arms wet and not having a wire right?

I like it when my teeth are brushed but I don't like getting to that point right? Those are simple executive function things that trip us up and occupy all of this real estate in our brain when if we can streamline those then we'll have more ability and energy to do the things that really make us happy.

Kirby: It's also like recognizing recognizing that like for me it's hard to the texture of like flavor and textures are huge for me just like my human has a distinct response to it so I need the right flavor of toothpaste you need the right texture of toothpaste but I like variety so like I'll go and try something and I don't like it.

All right yeah and I'm just like I have to make sure that I'm recognizing that my needs change so this is where like I intuitively select what is going to be the best fit for me and I give myself options and that's where like I've done natural toothpaste I've done you know just grocery store toothpaste and it's it's really like what does my human need in this moment?

Can it handle the grittiness of charcoal? Because sometimes I need that grit because it's way more fun to take charcoal toothpaste and like see how it looks on your teeth but I don't want to do that every day yeah yeah great I want to have some options I want to be able to make it fun and make it dopamine.

And like I make it like a challenge for myself and I I was like okay let's do 10 seconds just like I would with my kids right like we're just going to do 10 seconds and like I pull it out and then I'll sit there and I'll just like something that helps me is like having something I can like fight on.

Because then I can sit there and go like this and like yeah it's not the circles that the dentist tells you to do but I'm like it's getting done

Melanie Branch: now we understand that it's centering support that we need you know we've been told our whole life that it is really picky and now we understand no these are actual things that I require to get this stuff done and get it done properly which brings me to my next question.

Of time management do you have because I know that you work a muggle job and run your business and for anybody listening that doesn't know muggle job just means you know regular job and then you know running our business think of it more magical way do you have any tips or any tools that you use?

That would help other neuroscience the entrepreneurs that are also working?

Kirby: Yeah so I know there's I'm still kind of working through systems but also finding like the support right? Because for me like in order to implement a schedule I need accountability I need somewhere that sometimes I need to be somewhere like physically and sometimes I need to be somewhere mentally and emotionally right?

So like my scheduling I do it in blocks and I know you talked about this in your like your workshop you just had where you like you take your day and you like you You take it into quadrants right? Yeah what is my energy like when I first wake up? Like when do I wake up? Am I like someone who needs to go and move physically first thing in the morning?

Or am I someone that needs to move mentally? Like what if some days I need to get out and some days I need to stay in? How can I accommodate and like when I wake up I'm going to know Oh I need to take an extra 30 minutes in bed so I'm not going to have time to get the full shower done the full like you know balls to the walls ready.

I'm going to need a quicker routine a quicker get ready get going so I have certain triggers so like when I get up I always use the restroom right? Like you release all that energy first thing in the morning you take a moment and you just kind of what do I need? Sometimes I'm like I'm a drunk Kirsten like I'm not I'm not ready to be in this waking world.

And I just need to like sit there for a minute and I I found that like having wipes to clean a surface and set the energy into what I need it helps so like something I do to help my time management is have something that regardless of what time I wake up it's wake up time because clocks are like clocks are irrelevant.

Like what is the what is the internal clock saying? What is the internal schedule? What is the like what's the battery level at? Like do I need to charge my human? Do I need to unplug? Do I need to reset? Do I need to align? Like the way you schedule yourself is you automate as much as possible like I have my muggle job blocked out on from this time to this time and it can fluctuate but I know I have this time that's committed to this.

Arena and it's nice because my medical job fluctuates a lot and I can like move it around break it into pieces plug it in here or there I'm not chained to a desk I can work virtually I can work in office like I have that flexibility and the flexibility is key to doing

Melanie Branch: both for me yeah yeah I actually I am the same way when it comes to.

So 1st and foremost waking up in the morning a lot of ADHDers I forget the technical term for it but there's like a morning rage and it's a natural like hormonal chemical thing that happens to ADHDers in the morning so you know those people that have never been morning people like I have a family member who has never woken up bright eyed and bushy tailed a day in their life.

It simply does not once they need an hour in the morning of no talking to me don't speak don't look don't hang out and I've never been that way once my eyes are open they're open but I have found if I sit my happy ass down on the couch and start watching a show or scrolling on my phone before I have to like do things I'm not gonna get in a get up and go mood.

But if I get up in the morning and I stay upright And I stay vertical for 1 hour right? So I'll clean stuff up right? Like tidy up the kitchen tidy up the bedroom tidy up the living room da da da da that whole day I'll have good energy I'll be boop boop boop boop boop and I'll be able to easily power down because I've been working consistently and steadily all day.

So yeah really that giving yourself the permission To kind of be self obsessed for a little bit be like how do I feel about this? How does receiving this email make me feel right? So that we can stop reacting and we can instead respond right? I know personally to I have seen a really big improvement in my mood overall by limiting how often I check my emails and how often I respond to my emails.

Like I really I don't check my emails all day long there's like at 1 point during the day if I'm working that I will allow myself to check my emails or I just won't check them if I'm working on something in particular,

Kirby: and it's good to have those systems in place because like you're constantly checking your emails you're constantly pouring into that you're not present here right? Yeah there's times that I have to Like reset so like this is where I I like having a physical way to do this so like especially with my phone I just take it and swipe up on the the notifications right?

Clean out all the apps like wipe the energy away so that I can like set it to the side that's that this is me laptop I close it I wipe it down the action of like closing and putting away and then resetting the energy even if I don't have like a wipe my hand I just take my hand and wipe it connected it be like thank you for this.

We're going to close this off now like we'll come back to you later and closing out tabs is what I use but it's like something to like cue your brain we're we're going to be done with this task right now or we're going to put to the side or we're going to schedule a time to come back to this cause if I'm getting overwhelmed and I can't focus on what's in front of me that's not what needs my attention.

Like my my my body will tell me if my attention is needed elsewhere like okay I can't I can't sit still I need to walk around what can I do while I'm walking? What where where do I need to go? What do I need to feel? What can I do to get back into that? Like right cause if my body is asking me to do something to manage my time better I remember everything I need to do.

If I listen to what my body is asking me to do yeah everything is

Melanie Branch: done absolutely so as a member of the Neurospicy Academy one of the OG members I got in right at the beginning what is your favorite benefit of this? I don't even know what we call it a membership we call it an academy it's a lot of things that nobody else does.

That's why we started doing it so what's your

Kirby: favorite part? Yeah I like how it's evolving so I like how there's so much growth energy in it right? Because like if there's something that's not working for me or I'm confused by like I have a place to give feedback I have a place to like resources this is a resource for me.

It's also like accountability and body doubling and like When I am not able to focus on work but I gotta I gotta do it right I gotta plug in it's like I have a deadline and it's just like no no go go juice in my system I pop it open see who's there I can just say I'm struggling to focus you know and they're like okay well what are you focusing on?

Like did you eat? Did you have you taken care of everything you need to do that's stopping you from focusing on what you need to do right? Like those basic survival needs like as an aged year like I just I just got to hyper focus on work and if it's not working I'm just like hitting my head against the wall.

And it's a way to like get out of my own head and be like I don't know what I need but I need I need someone around me to regulate because my energy is not it's not working it's not effective so I love the community of it I love the accessibility of it like I can just open it up and also it's so much dopamine just running around on the little T Rex.

Like I love that and then we have the round table we go to is like every Tuesday night that I'm available I I love jumping in right and it's also like I use it in my work days at the buckle job I use it in my business it's it's whatever I need support in whether it's personal business creative like there's artists in the narrow spicy Academy.

There's coaches there's you and blue like you you guys are there to support us and we can wander around and if someone else is needed and then I also have community that's kind of built outside of that and they kind of build a buddies so there's like it almost feels like a club within it but just because like we were part of your community before.

Right? And so we've just kind of continued that relationship and I love it because we'll be like hey like are you going to be in the academy? I'm going in or hey like this is happening it's like fellow like fellow players fellow coaches yeah and it just it feels nice and then I see them on tick tock to like Joe like oh my goodness just seeing her there and then see like I get to know these like little celebrities that I'm just like can we just

Melanie Branch: be best friends?

Like it's a networking opportunity for sure collab and networking and really the peer support is something like I was just talking about this earlier today I had not realized how lonely entrepreneurship was until I started the Academy with Christina you know at the end of last year because I was so used to all right so I get up in the morning I get the kids to school I exercise I get ready I go live and then I sit here at my computer and I do work for a couple hours if I can get my brain if I can do it right?

And it wasn't until we had this Virtual campus and we and like we thought we were only going to like when it started we were doing office hours and okay I'll be here for you know here 5 hours a week and now we when we're up and working we're on campus and we are available for members of the academy for whatever it is they need right?

Message us on Slack come hang out with us on campus ask your questions this is what we're here for right? So it's really a level of real time coaching that just isn't available anywhere else

Kirby: yeah and it's also like co workers because like that's the part you love about the Muggle job is the co workers right?

That you you work somewhere not be like yes you need the funds to fund your your human experience but also like you need you need your people like the biggest impact of the pandemic for so many people is they lost their communities yeah and then we were sitting with ourselves and like yes it was a great hermit moment for the collective of just like we're going to hone in on what we need and really search inward and find ourselves.

But like most of us have gone through that journey and we're like okay I found myself now who's going to talk to me who's going to like me where do I go from here? Because we unmasked so much we need a space that's comfortable for us to be on math that understands Ooh like the sounds here are too much.

Ooh the textures are too much like I'm overstimulated right now what can I do to regulate myself? Where are resources? And I love it like cause I'll just sit there like listening to the conversation that's happening while I'm sitting there working and then I'll I'll pop pipe in eventually but like usually you just see my face and I'm just like and I'm just like like I'm just like that animated character that's in the background.

Right and it's it's nice because I feel like I'm not alone when I need like I need someone there but I don't need them to like talk to me I just need them to be around me and that's more like coworking parallel play like yes it's nice to have that in real life and it's nice to have it where you could just open up and be like yo you up at 2 a.

m yeah

Melanie Branch: yeah absolutely and you know like we say we welcome all but we cater to neurodivergent entrepreneurs right? Because there is a mindset right? A growth mindset that runs through every person that is successful at the Neurospicy Academy and who really is going to do well there you have to be open to coaching.

You have to be open to new ideas and really open to the idea that like you're going to learn something new every day right? We just absolutely know that we're going to learn something new every day are you open to it? Or are you of the mindset that you already know it all

always

Kirby: learning? Like one of the biggest lessons I've learned is either I'm going to learn or I'm going to win right so this like opportunity to learn because a lot of times we're faced with like this like I'm not where I want to be but I know I'm doing everything I should be doing and we should on ourselves.

Right yeah so we're saying they're shitting on ourselves like I should be successful I should be getting you know all this success in my business and you're just like you're in your own energy sitting there and it's not till you're like Hey I'm struggling with this what can we do? How can we problem solve this?

Or hearing someone else struggle with something you can't even vocalize yet like to go viral and then like not got hurts like what am I doing wrong? Yeah right right right you start questioning yourself that rejection sensitivity comes kicking in you're just like you know I'm doing all this should things but you're are you doing what you need?

Are you pouring into yourself? Because if you're pouring from an empty cup you can't expect abundance yeah right it's just it doesn't work that way so having people who are also in this journey and you can be like Hey fellow traveler fellow you know member of this community can we can we just sit here and like exist together?

Like it's it's existing

Melanie Branch: in a space that's

Kirby: safe and is obsessed with your success

Melanie Branch: absolutely we are obsessed with your success you're not wrong so how would you or how do you practice self care regularly as a quantum coach?

Kirby: So this is where it varies right? Because I'm I need different things for different seasons of my life part of it is where the burner method right? Self care is I can only have four burners on I can have my muggle job my business my kids and myself I I I can't add more into that in one day so what are my what are my four burners?

Who's who's on which hats am I wearing? So it's it's also like identifying ways to set boundaries with myself and like give myself that space to develop and like just allow things to simmer allow things to marinate like if I can't pour into this maybe I need to pour into this because in order for my business and everything else to be successful I have to be overflowing with goodness.

So that's where did I hydrate? The hydration is one of the biggest things Do I have people who can hold me accountable to eating food? So that's something I struggle with as a nerve spice individual so I make sure I I I also like if I'm going to care about someone else am I caring about myself the same way?

Like that's a question I ask like I needed food and I didn't want to eat and so I was like you know what the person next to me might need food maybe I can get something for the both of us and then I will feel better about eating because as a coach as a healer as someone that is obsessed with seeing everyone else progress and learn what I've learned.

I forget that my needs and their needs may be the same and this is something that I realized when like people are like oh are you hungry? And I was like no are you hungry? Like people ask me if if I'm hungry when they're hungry right? Yeah and I'm like maybe there's a reason for that maybe there's an opportunity there to be like Oh you know what?

I am hungry you're hungry too let's co regulate let's collaborate in getting both of our needs met yeah because if it can be equally beneficial I'm more likely to pour into me if I know someone else is going to benefit and that's something about being a coach and being who I am where I'm obsessed with everyone else's success right?

And their success is my success yeah is that mutually like whatever you do like I'm happy to help you do it I'm happy to see you succeed like you winning is a win

Melanie Branch: yeah absolutely yeah all right so before we hit the lightning round of the fun neuro spicy question tell everybody where they can find you on the social will also be linked up to everything here.

So tell us where can we find you?

Kirby: So I am I think most social media platforms tickety tock is where we met insta is where we have our portfolio of photos that I could benefit from updating I have you know my my Stan store which where what's the

Melanie Branch: what are they called? What's your what's your As?

Kirby: My names? Yeah oh quantum Kirby Coaching

Melanie Branch: quantum Kirby QU quantum and then Kirby with a K and then coaching with a CQ,

Kirby: KC

Melanie Branch: Q KC Quantum Kirby Coaching and that's on Instagram? That's on TikTok mm-Hmm

Kirby: and it's Kirsten like Kirby so yeah that's you can you can find me anywhere kirsten like Kirby yeah Kirsten not Kristen

Melanie Branch: yeah Kirsten not Kirby all right are you ready for lightning round? Sure.

What is your favorite social media platform? TikTok what is the most recent rabbit hole you've gone down? Meridians what? Meridians meridian what is that? You gotta tell us about

Kirby: it the Meridian oh okay okay okay so the meridians are the energetic like circular vascular system of the body right so I actually have a chart here and it's like visuals because I'm a visual person.

So people listening sorry but this is the meridians and like Chinese and Arabic and you can see a lot of this so having those visuals because like I feel meridians and people's energetic fields and so like having a visual to see them and it's just there's layers to it there's depth to it like I've I feel these so having someone like map it out I'm like oh yeah that's what I feel that's the rabbit hole I went down recently is clearing them out resetting them.

Making sure that you know they're they're running properly like I went through my meridians energetic flash and I did that 1 of my clients so

Melanie Branch: that's fine I don't know all right what's your emotional support show?

Minus parts and single drunk female single drunk female I haven't gotten into that I was thinking about it but I haven't gotten into it yeah all right

Kirby: resonates with my soul I

Melanie Branch: love it all right have you consumed water today and do you want to share your emotional.

Kirby: I have consumed water and my emotional support cup is oh I'm shopping for 1 because I'm I'm a beverage goblin where I just I have beverages everywhere I had a coffee cup I have a tea cup I have three cups in my car I have like four on my bed like like I have I have beverages everywhere yeah.

So like having one solo we have multiple support cups

Melanie Branch: right now oh good I'm happy to hear it I'm heading to the market for a new one don't you worry all right and then the final question what is your current dopamine snack and or meal? Okay

Kirby: Oreos and gummy worms dopamine snacks sour gummy worms specifically because of how it helps regulate the vagus nerve.

Ramen ramen is like

Melanie Branch: she's just oof

Kirby: the cheap stuff the fancy stuff like just ramen ramen noodles or spaghetti I haven't met a noodle I didn't

Melanie Branch: like yeah I haven't met one yet yeah that pasta yeah good news yeah! All right Kirsten like Kirby thank you so much for being here and everybody that is listening go follow Kirby.

I've known her for many many years and I love her so much and again you can find her at Quantum Kirby Coaching quantum Coach Kirby all right everybody we love you grumpy

Kirby: Coaching bye!