Feminist Business Coaching Tips with Melanie Childers | Episode 005
Ever wondered what it really takes to build a successful business while staying true to your authentic self? What if I told you that the secret isn't grinding harder or following some cookie-cutter formula, but actually doing the complete opposite?
In this episode, I sit down with master certified coach Melanie Childers, who helps feminist entrepreneurs grow and scale their businesses without using toxic "dude bro" tactics. Her story of going from a Fortune 50 employee to a thriving entrepreneur after a breast cancer diagnosis at 34 will leave you feeling inspired and ready to bet on yourself.
From Corporate Life to Entrepreneurial Freedom
Melanie's entrepreneurial journey didn't start with a grand business plan or a trust fund. It started with a life-altering breast cancer diagnosis at 34 that completely "dropped a bomb" on her planned life. Working in corporate training with a master's degree in adult education, she realized that the life she had planned wasn't the life she actually wanted.
But here's the thing - this wasn't Melanie's first rodeo with entrepreneurship. She had previously run a yarn-dyeing business (because, as she puts it, she's a knitter and just "really loved doing that"). It's such an ADHD thing to casually mention dyeing yarn like it's no big deal, right?
After closing that business to focus on her health, Melanie discovered coaching through Jen Sincero's "You Are a Badass" and worked with Jen in her early small group programs. What started as needing tools for her own healing journey evolved into helping other women navigate their own transformations.
The "Good Girl" Conditioning That Keeps Us Small
One of the most powerful parts of our conversation centered around what Melanie calls the "good girl" conditioning that holds so many entrepreneurs back. You know what I'm talking about - that invisible box society tells us we're supposed to fit in where we can't be too loud, but not too soft, not too ambitious, but definitely not a wallflower.
"Don't be too ambitious. Don't brag about how much money you make or what you have or how well you're doing," Melanie explains. "Hide and cover up and look perfect and make sure everybody's happy. And the truth is like building a business goes against all of that conditioning."
This conditioning creates what's called imposter syndrome - that nagging voice that tells high-achieving women their success is due to luck rather than their own skills and worth. For neurodivergent entrepreneurs (those with ADHD, autism, or other neurological differences), this is compounded by a lifetime of masking their true selves to fit in.
The Power of Language in Mindset Work
Here's where things get really practical. Melanie and I both believe in actionable mindset strategies, not just fluffy affirmations. One of my favorite tools that I shared is eliminating "should" from your vocabulary entirely.
Think about it - shame lives in "should." When you say "I should send 10 emails today," your brain immediately goes into resistance mode. But when you reframe it as "I would benefit from sending those 10 emails today," suddenly it becomes a choice rather than a demand.
Why this works for neurodivergent brains: Our brains are always one step ahead of us, and they won't release the "go-go juice" (dopamine, norepinephrine, and epinephrine) needed to start and complete tasks if those tasks sound like a drag. Your brain literally rebels against shame-based motivation.
Balancing Business and Life When You Work From Home
Let's be real - when you're an entrepreneur working from home, your life and business completely mesh. Your calendar becomes this wild mixture of client calls, doctor's appointments, kids' activities, and date nights. The traditional 9-to-5 mentality just doesn't work.
Melanie's solution? Theme days. She's structured her week so that:
Mondays are coaching days (client work and community support)
Tuesdays are creation days (getting ideas out of her brain)
Wednesdays are one-on-one coaching
Thursdays are recording days (taking Tuesday's creations and actually producing them)
Fridays are catch-up and admin only
This approach honors the ADHD brain's need for focus while preventing the overwhelm that comes from trying to do everything every day.
Strengthening Your Intuition for Business Success
Both Melanie and I are huge believers that connecting to your intuition is non-negotiable for business success. For Melanie, this meant following her personal energy patterns and asking herself key questions: Where's my energy at? What fuels me? How do I want to feel?
She discovered her peak creative and productive hours are 11 AM to 2 PM, with another surge in the evenings. Instead of fighting this natural rhythm, she built her business around it.
Pro tip: Melanie keeps a notebook by her bed because her ADHD brain loves to come alive with ideas at 9 or 10 PM. Rather than letting those thoughts interrupt family time, she jots them down to revisit later.
Dealing with Rejection and Self-Doubt
Here's something that might surprise you - for many entrepreneurs, the rejection from friends and family hurts more than potential clients saying no. This hits especially hard for those of us with rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD), which occurs in about 99% of people with ADHD.
RSD develops because undiagnosed ADHD kids hear "no" about 300,000 times by age five, compared to neurotypical children. We literally come out of the womb learning to mask who we are to avoid rejection.
Melanie's approach to handling this? She spent 2-3 years doing intensive self-coaching and mindset work to "completely detach emotionally from the sale and emotionally from someone else's rejection." The goal isn't to not care - it's to separate your self-worth from other people's responses.
The Magic of Manifestation (Without the Woo-Woo)
When we talked about manifestation, Melanie got real about what actually works. It's not just visualizing and hoping things appear. It's about "becoming the version of you that believes that you are worthy of it, that believes that what you want is possible for you."
Her practical approach? She has a list of intentional thoughts about her next level that she's recorded on her phone. During walks around her neighborhood, she listens to herself describing who she is, what's possible for her, and the impact she's making.
This isn't just positive thinking - it's training your brain to see yourself bigger and align with the version of you that already has what you want.
The Biggest Risk That Changed Everything
When I asked about her biggest business risk, Melanie shared something brutally honest: hiring a high-end coach for several years that was "a lot more than my business could really afford at the time."
The investment was worth it in some ways - she learned a lot and worked through issues faster than she could have alone. But there was a major downside: she stopped listening to herself and started trying to become another version of her coach instead of amplifying her own voice.
"Every single time that I sounded like or did things their way, I sounded like them and it was freaking crickets for my audience," she reflects. "They wanted me and my flavor and my take, not me edited through the lens of these other people."
This is such an important reminder for all of us: your audience wants YOU, not a watered-down version of someone else's success formula.
Self-Care That Actually Works
Forget bubble baths and face masks (though Melanie does take good care of her skin). Real self-care for entrepreneurs looks like:
Taking walks and moving your body even when you don't feel like it
Leaving the house in the middle of the workday for a new perspective
Having creative outlets completely separate from your business (Melanie knits)
Fueling your body with foods that support sustained energy
Taking brain breaks when you need them
The key is honoring your energy patterns rather than forcing yourself into someone else's productivity schedule.
Current Wins and What's Next
Melanie recently launched her first course expecting to sell maybe 10-20 spots. She sold 50. This success came from putting in the work to give massive value ahead of time, which is always the game-changer.
You can find Melanie and all her badass feminist entrepreneur wisdom at:
Links to Connect with Melanie Childers:
Consensual Sales Masterclass: Join Here
TikTok: @themelaniechilders
Facebook: melaniedc
Instagram: @melaniechilderscoaching
Ready to Build Your Own Authentic Business?
The biggest takeaway from my conversation with Melanie? You don't have to choose between success and authenticity. In fact, the more you show up as your true self - ADHD brain, feminist values, unconventional schedule and all - the more magnetic you become to the right people.
Building a business is absolutely a personal growth journey, and having the right support makes all the difference. If you're ready to dive deeper into mindset work that actually creates lasting change, subscribe to my newsletter for weekly strategies, real talk, and tools designed specifically for neurodivergent entrepreneurs who are ready to stop playing small.
Your authentic voice is your competitive advantage - it's time to use it.
